The Dullsvillain

Slinging mud at the media of Dullsville (aka Perth, Western Australia)

An Open Letter to Channel Ten and the producers of “Before the Game”

with 2 comments

Dear Channel Ten and the producers of Before the Game,

Settling down in front of the TV for the Eagles last night, I tuned in to the best footy show on the box: Before the Game. Good job on that show! Unlike other footy shows, it isn’t self serious and doesn’t rely on fabricated controversy or inflated egos. It’s funny, and full of exuberance for AFL footy. Last night’s 30 minute episode was no exception. Kevin Rudd receiving “Tool of the Week” for handballing like a girl and calling himself “The Ruddster” was a highlight.

Just one thing. At the end of the show, as the credits rolled, host Andrew Maher yelled out the result of the Eagles v North Melbourne match, which had just finished at Subiaco. Great! Everyone loves live results. Everyone, that is, except for a few hundred thousand Perth viewers, who were waiting for the delayed telecast of the match and had scrupulously avoided finding out the score in order to keep it interesting.

I was one of those Perth viewers. Like so many other Eagles’ supporters, I naively enjoyed last night’s Before the Game with my glass of Chardonnay and looked forward to another promising performance from the Eagles’ youngsters. That is, before Maher exploded my bubble by shouting “West Coast by 38 points over North Melbourne” seconds before the telecast started. I can only liken the psychological impact of Maher’s betrayal to the traumatic realisation, at the tender age of 5, that there was no Father Christmas. I felt robbed, deceived, and powerless.

So thanks for killing the potential for any excitement in what turned out to be a thoroughly boring match.

Look, I don’t have a PhD in live television. But I do remember an old trick Channel 7 used to great effect.  It went something like: “If you don’t want to know the scores, look away now”. It was crude – but undeniably effective. Maybe you guys have a more sophisticated way to prevent such monumental cock ups. I don’t know. All I know is that Father Christmas isn’t visiting on December 25, or ever again.

Accordingly, I write to implore that Maher and the autocue operator responsible for this outrage be dubbed the round 21 Tools of the Week.

I look forward to your reply.

Yrs.

Dick

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2 Responses

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  1. Well, our first ever reply to an open letter. It ain’t much, but it’s something:

    “Hi Dick,

    Thank you for your email.

    I will be sure to pass it onto the producers of the show.

    Sorry to inconvenience you.

    Kind regards,

    Natasha”

    We’ll see if this goes anywhere.

    Dick

    August 19, 2009 at 7:23 pm

  2. It’s mind boggling that you got a response Dick. It just boggles the mind.

    Considering that we’re from Dullsville, i don’t think we hold much credence when it comes to the ratings.

    On the other hand, we might just decide to re-boycott the Western front.

    Uncle Mac

    August 20, 2009 at 12:47 am


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