The Dullsvillain

Slinging mud at the media of Dullsville (aka Perth, Western Australia)

Jak Attak!

with 3 comments

Many times, the AFL football just find big boring. But never, never when the fountain of knowledge in flowing from the mouth of GLEN JAKOVICH!

The Sultan of Subiaco, the Sheik of Spearwood, [ed: formerly King of Klaremont] “Jako” surely is the worst commentator person in all of Australia. He speaks English worse than “this Chinaman”.

And here I present the evidence from Sunday Eagles game on Channel 7 TV. Actually I only switch on the recorder in the second half. Yet still, so many great bits i can’t even include them all. Jako is very Dullsville-special. So think a guy in Victoria sits in a room beeping out all these comments from the Victoria broadcast. So I put this in the “Perth Media Shame” category already, as definitely no-one outside Dullsville would tolerate this low standards of “Special Comments”. But maybe Jako Attako could become a new category, every weeks?

Let us try the “highlights reel” first, then maybe analyze, one by one.

For those still with me, let us listen one-by-one…I repeat, all of these just from less-than-one-half of football game!

(Need to increase the the volumes for some reason. Sorry.)

“Overpass?” I never heard of this, but that doesn’t mean much. But all my friends assure me there is definitely no exist this thing in AFL!

Why Jako has to always draw his breath in sharply? Is it to indicate change of subject? This will be a Jako KPI in the future.

The only way to “deal with” Jako. Brian Taylor, who Jako call “BT”, checks his polite at the door, but must be rude like this when Jako is “all over the place”.

This was I think very slick from Jako: He start to say “That’s the value of…”, but he realize he actually don’t know what is valuable, and seamlessly switch to the nice cliche “he’s growing in confidence”. How slick! Then BT shows appreciation by interrupt him again…

Yes Jako, of course the poor pathways always needing aid…

A man of great wisdom.

Good thing this was broadcast on TV with the picture to distract… only painful for anyone who clicks the button to hear it blind.

New word of English language: maximumize. Yes maybe including the last bit also wasn’t necessary, too painful again?

Feet are the opponent, the obstacle… strange world is Jako’s world.

Does he talk about Milne or Montagna? Jako, you should let it go, that stuff is “soooo” 2004.


3 Responses

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  1. “Well we spoke about that kick from Hurn (it) had to be spot on… the two weapons they’ve got is obviously, ahhh, in kicking, uh, power, is uh, Hurn and, uh, the big Q.”

    “That’s the value… his growing stature of his marking confidence…”

    Jacko metaphorically and literally sucks so bad I can barely watch the Sunday Perth Channel 7 (Foxtel) broadcast anymore.

    But Zhu, the fact that you got a 60 second clip of Jacko’s commentary without the term “work-rate” thrown in there is quite the coup. Maybe he is getting better? Nah.


    July 18, 2009 at 12:22 am

  2. This is a good blog. It took me far too long to find the COMMENTS link. [Forrest Gump voice] I am not a smart man.

    I thought this mighta bin one of those rare uber chic NO COMMENTING blogs.

    Jako is as thick as pig shit as a commentator. Surely he won’t get another contract? But he was a fantastic player, and when his family had that big blue that ended up in the courts the man 100% maintained his dignity. A true gent.

    Unlike, say, the sordid court battle with George “Gorilla Shits” Grljusich and his sibs.

    Big Ramifications

    July 19, 2009 at 5:55 pm

  3. Jako smiješno životnim lekcijama


    February 4, 2010 at 6:07 pm

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