Show us ya hoon
In New York a few years ago, I remember being amused at how the New York Post called cops “cops”. Like, a story would lead in with “An off-duty rookie cop was fatally shot in East Harlem last night”. Fair enough. Everyone calls cops “cops”, so why not the newspaper? But it sounds wrong, like your grandmother dropping the F-bomb.
Then there’s the way the media of Western Australia INSISTS on flogging the term “hoon”:
Doing a burnout with his 14-month-old son and girlfriend in the passenger seats was the final indiscretion for 20-year-old hoon Ryan James Joseph, the first person to have a car confiscated under tough anti-hoon laws.
The West’s unironic love of the term “hoon” gives you a pretty good indication of who this rag is being sold to. Basically, fist-shaking fogies:
Problem is, no one else uses the word hoon. The top definition for hoon on Urban Dictionary, which reads:
1. To travel at speed in a confined area, or do burnouts on a public road in traffic.
2. To show off in a dagerous [sic] manner, mostly with a vehicle or engine powered item.
Look at that bloody dangerous hoon!!
(YELLED IN ANNOYANCE AT OFFENDER).. YA FUCKIN’ HOON!!!
The second definition for hoon on Urban Dictionary, with a close 50+ thumbs up, is where things get interesting:
A vulgar alternative to the word “cunt”.
The prime minister in [sic] an utter hoon.
Or, I drank 8 pints of lager and got completely hooned.
After the jump, I translate today’s hoon story in the West accordingly:
Serial cunt’s car on way to crusher as deterrent
Doing a burnout with his 14-month-old son and girlfriend in the passenger seats was the final indiscretion for 20-year-old cunt Ryan James Joseph, the first person to have a car confiscated under tough anti-cunt laws.
Joseph, who has a long driving record which includes driving while disqualified, reckless driving and previous cunt offences, has also lost his licence for 18 months, was given a suspended jail term and put on an intensive supervision order.
Police Minister Rob Johnson condemned Joseph’s driving record yesterday, saying he had asked senior police to crush the car as a deterrent to other cunts.
“When you see the record of this young cunt driver and you see the sorts of things he has done, I am sure that everyone in WA would agree that he didn’t deserve to be on the roads any more and certainly his vehicle won’t be on the roads any more,” Mr Johnson said.
“He was stupid enough to cunt in front of police. The stupidity of this young man; he was caught doing these cunt offences with his 14-month-old son in the back seat.”
Mr Johnson said tougher cunt laws the Government would introduce into Parliament this year would result in the mandatory confiscation of cars for a third cunt offence.
“I am introducing further amendments to the new legislation . . . which will make it a very serious offence for anyone who is caught cunting for their third offence to in any way devalue the vehicle,” he said.
WA Police Commissioner Karl O’Callaghan said the Government had made it clear there would be serious consequences for cunt behaviour and he hoped the confiscation would be a strong deterrent to others.
“The West Australian public are fed up with cunts and so are police. We will continue to target and prosecute cunts to the full extent of the law.”